Who’s ready to start talking about ages and stages of life, and how we can support happy healthy hormones that target those times?!? Let’s dive in, starting with tweens, pre-teens and teens! This is a LONG post, but my friends, I know that if you have teens at home you are WITH ME on this one because it’s a HUGE piece of our hearts as parents and grandparents. So get cozy, get ready to learn, and let’s dive in!
This is an area in life where my husband and I have had LOTS of practice! When we joined Young Living almost 7 years ago, our children were 4, 9, 11 and 12. We had ZERO teens in the house. Today they are 11, 16, 18 and 19. Our oldest and youngest are girls, the two in the middle are boys.
We have done, and are currently doing, the teenage hormone dance in our home! And guess what? We absolutely LOVE this dance and this season of life. It keeps us alert, on our toes, and gives us the opportunity to grow in our own hearts to learn and love so that we understand, honor, and love our children well.
Friends, if there’s ONE THING you can do to support your kids’ hormones as they go through this season of life, it’s to LISTEN. Be patient, demonstrate through listening that they can trust you, don’t react and pass judgement when they come to you with BIG things…. or little things, and walk in love and grace.
Because, guess what? We don’t always know what’s best for our kids. We don’t always have the right answers. We don’t always know what is going on in their hearts and minds. We think we do, but most often we don't. I’m amazed at the number of times I stop to listen to my teens, and the conversations go in VERY different directions than I anticipate, and how deeply my kids think and feel. You guys, our kids are amazing. When we stop to listen to them, we have the opportunity to learn SO much!
Bottom line: hormones are at work, which is exactly as it should be. What your pre-teens and teens want from you, no matter what their hormones are doing, is to know they can trust you with no judgement. You can use all the essential oils on the planet but if you miss this, you will miss the KEY to the absolute JOY that the teenage years are.
With that said, what are hormones actually doing during this season of life and HOW can we support them? We have some amazing tools that help bring balance to areas that may seem out of balance, and in our home we have had incredible results. I’m going to share exactly what we have done and do, so buckle up! It’s about be get REAL good!
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For either gender, the onset of hormonal changes begins in the same place: the hypothalamus.
The brain sends a signal that it’s time to begin creating hormones that start the growing and developing process. Isn’t that amazing? One little signal from the brain starts it all.
From there, it is a fine balance of keeping progesterone, estrogen, and testosterone at the levels they should be. It’s a dance to help the body know what growing and changing is all about, and to keep that process going. And this all begins with a signal from the brain. Wow.
This means….. diffusing is KEY! Our kids are bombarded with toxic aromas and products all around them, no matter how careful we are in the home. They have our DNA that has been loaded with toxins from our past, and they have their own attack as they are out and about in the world. One of the best things we can do for our kids is diffuse in the home, morning, noon and night. We want to send as many happy signals to the brain as possible so that little hypothalamus, that has a GREAT BIG JOB, is sending all the right signals to the rest of the body.
We discovered just how valuable diffusing is with our boys. I had been diffusing the blend of oil called Thieves in their rooms at night to support their immune systems since that's what Thieves is so good at. I was really consistent with it during the winter (because, GERMS), and then, one day in the spring, I slacked off. You guys, the next day was AGONY! The boys were at each other, moody, and the house was ‘off’. In that moment, I made a connection. I hadn’t diffused Thieves!
Why is Thieves such a great one for hormonal kids? It has spice oils in it (Cinnamon and Clove) and those oils help with communication between the right side and left side of the brain. So basically, in diffusing Thieves at night, I was feeding their brains all the right signals to keep that hypothalamus happy. You can bet that we haven’t missed a night of Thieves in our home since then! Every. single. night. For 7 years.
But also remember! We want to feed the brain from every direction, and since the gut and the brain are connected, be sure the gut is sending proper signals to the brain by offering your kids NINGXIA RED and LIFE 9 or MIGHTYPRO. This has been another KEY in my home.
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What we have found is that pre-teens and teens have similar hormonal needs. Not much changed once they crossed over from pre-teens to teens in the oiling department. We have made a few changes depending on specific needs, which I’ll share below, but the following information is what the ‘protocol’ has been for our kids that has really been wonderful through this season with them.
Please note: This is just what we do, and is not a prescription, diagnosis, or treatment. It's just how I, as a mom of 4, have used my oils as I have researched and interacted with my own children. Play around with what works best for you! If you aren’t seeing the results you are looking for, try something different. We have SO many tools at our fingertips. If I can find support in my home for my teens that proved to be a game-changer, I am more than confident you can, too, because our needs were BIG! If your needs are BIG you are in the right place! Some changes came quickly for us, others took time and patience to find the right combo. So keep at it and be an advocate for happy hormones for your kids!
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You ready? Here's what we did/do.....
For the GIRLS in the AM
Pick ANY oil: (This is the same for girls and boys.) First thing in the morning, get the diffuser going! I find it often doesn’t matter what’s in there as long as I have the diffuser going with SOMETHING. My favorites to diffuse in the morning are R.C. or Lemon, Peppermint and Northern Lights Black Spruce.
FRANKINCENSE: I apply this to the back of the neck on my girls. I want all those signals from the brain traveling down the spine and through the nervous system to have FANTASTIC signals. I also want all the cells to be reminded of the proper way to function. The back of the neck is one of our most-oiled zones for ALL of us in our home! (My mama tip: For myself, I do R.C. on the back of my neck every morning. It’s full of fantastic oils for the nervous system, emotions, hormones, circulatory system, oxygenation, and so much more. I do this every single day. Yes, it’s most well-known for it’s respiratory support, but I have found it’s my oil for SO much more!)
VALOR: We put this one over the heart. It helps give confidence, courage, and CALM. It helps to ground girls to be more level-headed and handle emotions with more grace. It contains SPRUCE which is grounding and emotionally balancing as well as a fantastic support to hormones, CAMPHOR which supports the nervous system and is calming, BLUE TANSY which is calming and hormone-like, FRANKINCENSE which improves attitudes, and GERANIUM which is one of the most commonly used oils to support female hormones.
GERANIUM: When our oldest began her cycle and it became INCREDIBLY painful, we found that putting several drops of Geranium over the adrenals offered quite a bit of relief. I would use it like a salt shaker and get a bunch of drops over her adrenals, and rub it in (deep massage if she needed that, gentle touch if that’s what she needed). We’d apply every 10 minutes or so until symptoms were gone. This is something we used as-needed, but not every day.
ENDOFLEX: This oil is AMAZING. It amplifies metabolism and vitality and creates hormonal balance. We most often use it every morning over the adrenals (lower back). It contains SPEARMINT which has hormone-like activity, SAGE which helps dispel negative emotions, GERANIUM which assists in balancing hormones, MYRTLE which helps normalize hormonal imbalances of the thyroid and ovaries, CHAMOMILE which protects the liver (remember how important the liver is with it’s job of processing leftover hormones?!?), and NUTMEG which supports the adrenal glands. This oil is SO fantastic at helping to balance hormones, that I once heard a mom share that she never lets teens into her home without first having this one in the diffuser! Endoflex Vitality can also be taken in a capsule, or sublingual. (Vitality is the same oil inside the bottle as the regular Endoflex bottle, it just has a different label.) If you have kids in your home, YOU WANT ENDOFLEX IN YOUR STASH STAT!
Finally, in the morning, let them choose an oil to use. Kids are intuitive and know what they need, and what they choose might surprise you! (Just remember, don’t react when it does surprise you. LOVE them and HONOR them!) They can apply it wherever they want to. This helps them feel a sense of ownership, and teaches them to care for their health. Teaching them this is POWERFUL!
For GIRLS in the PM
THIEVES: We do 7 drops in the diffuser every. single. night. Afer reading my story above, it's no surprise as to why! It contains CLOVE which is a mental stimulant; it encourages sleep, stimulates dreams, and creates a sense of protection and courage, LEMON which is incredibly uplifting to the hormones AND a great support to the liver, CINNAMON BARK which is uplifting and also supports the gut (hooray for more oils to connect a happy gut with a happy brain!), EUCALYPTUS which helps cope with negative emotions, and ROSEMARY which helps improve mental clarity, boosts alertness, eases anxiety, and amplifies mental ability.
PROGESSENCE PLUS: We apply one to two drops on the wrists. For our 9-year-old we don't do it every day, but rather as-needed, when emotions are higher than normal. For our oldest daughter, we did it daily until her cycles balanced out. We worked with our nutritionist and used it until her Progesterone levels were back to normal. This is a powerful, natural way to add progesterone to the body, when the body has been bombarded by xenoestrogen that have caused progesterone levels to plummet. Many (but not all) girls and women need Progessence Plus to fight off years of xenoestrogen and keep progesterone levels where they need to be. You will see this oil mentioned for all the other seasons of life for women as well. It contains NATURAL HORMONE EXTRACTS from wild yam, as well as FRANKINCENSE, BERGAMOT, and PEPPERMINT. Each of these essential oils have a specific purpose at supporting the body, and also amplify the impact of the wild yam extract.
JOY: We apply 1-2 drops over the heart. You can put it in a roller diluted if you prefer! It has many hormone-supporting oils, and helps balance moods. It contains ROSE which brings joy to the heart, BERGAMOT which balances hormones, calms emotions, and relieves anxiety, stress, and tension, TANGERINE which is calming, promotes happiness and combats irritability, YLANG YLANG which balances female energies, LEMON which reduces depression, GERANIUM which helps release negative memories, JASMINE which brings feelings of love, support, and joy, PALMAROSA which brings about a feeling of security as it enhances the nervous and cardiovascular systems, CHAMOMILE which releases mental blocks and supports the liver, and CORIANDER which is soothing, calming, and supports the pancreas.
LEMON: This is a GREAT one to apply 1-2 drops on the bottom of feet. It’s fresh and uplifting, and it also supports the liver during the nighttime hours when the liver is receiving the most energy. Keep that liver happy for happy hormones!
LAVENDER: We do 1-2 drops on the back of the neck. Again, we like to keep the communication from the brain to the rest of the body in tip-top shape! This is also a great one to apply to the ankles, which connect to the uterus in reflexology.
When monthly cycles begin, DRAGON TIME and PANAWAY are two more oils that we use during the menses to reduce pain. We apply them as-needed over the tummy, adrenals, and ankles.
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For BOYS in the AM
Pick ANY oil: Just like we do for our girls, we do for the boys. ANY oil in the diffuser will help support their growth, development, and emotions. Respect their desires if they have certain aromas they don’t care for. For instance, my son doesn’t like the aroma of Stress Away. Crazy, right? It’s one of my ALL-TIME favorite aromas! But out of respect for my son, I don’t put it in the diffuser. I wear it, and he doesn’t seem to notice, but I don’t diffuse it. There are SO many oils to choose from, and little decisions like this to honor our kids can have BIG impact. You can read in the section for girls what some of our favorite oils are for the diffuser.
FRANKINCENSE: We do 1-2 drops on the back of the neck, just like we do for the girls. See above for more details.
TREE OILS: Northern Lights Black Spruce, Pine, Idaho Blue Spruce, Believe… all these are fantastic oils to choose for boys. I let my boys smell the tree oils I have, and choose what they want to apply. They each support healthy testosterone levels and bring a feeling of balance, grounding and security. Over the heart is a great place to apply a couple of drops.
After that, it’s similar to how we do oils for the girls. Endoflex on the adrenals, Valor on the back of the neck, and their oil of choice on their location of choice.
For BOYS in the PM
THIEVES: 7 drops in the diffuser. Read the description above for all the reasons why!
RELEASE: We do 1-2 drops over the liver. I have found that the emotions of my boys went through a season of being INTENSE. Using Release over the liver at night was profound for us. I remember one night my son was in tears saying, “Am I going to need to use this oil forever?!?” He knew it worked, but he also didn’t like that he felt so out of control without it. We did it faithfully every night until that season of intense emotions ended. Release is a fantastic oil for the liver because it not only brings balance, but it helps process anger that is stored in the liver. Release contains YLANG YLANG which balances female and male energies, LAVANDIN which is calming, GERANIUM which assists in balancing hormones, SANDALWOOD which helps remove negative programming in the cells, BLUE TANSY which combats anger and negative emotions, GRAPEFRUIT which reduces anxiety and releases depression, DAVANA which helps ease anxious feelings and nervousness, JASMINE which brings feelings of love, support, and joy, ROSE which brings joy to the heart, BLUE CYPRESS which helps with brain function, TANGERINE which is calming and relaxing, LIME which is stimulating, CHAMOMILE which releases mental blocks and supports the liver, OCOTEA which brings feelings of security, LEMON which is uplifting and supports the liver, and SPEARMINT which opens and releases emotional blocks.
JOY: You can read about this one up in the section for girls. We have found this one to be fantastic for both our boys AND girls. We do 1-2 drops over the heart.
LAVENDER: On the back of the neck. It’s calming and once again great for brain/body/hormone communication.
LEMON: On the feet! A couple drops just like we do for the girls.
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Finally, let's talk about SKIN! Hormonal breakouts is a BIG deal for our teens. I remember hating my skin as a teen, and trying all kinds of things to make the blemishes go away. When my kids are consistent, they see results. They use the DIY face wash and toner that I use for myself, and then Tea Tree to spot treat blemishes. Life 9 is a must-have for gut support to combat blemishes! GAME CHANGER. My kids also really like the Orange Blossom Moisturizer.
Do my kids have perfect skin? No, they don't. They aren't always consistent. But when they are, they see changes. When they drink water, they see changes. Then they don't eat sugar, dairy and gluten, they see changes. They are learning that their choices impact their health and skin, and those are GREAT lessons to learn!
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I'm excited for you to begin using more tools to guide your kids through this season of life. I'd love to hear what works in your home! Please share your successes in the comments so we can all learn and grow together.
Then LOVE. LISTEN. LEARN.
Truly know and honor your kids and you will be in place to embrace this crazy-wonderful season of life!
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